Was watching a commercial from Boots just the other day saying “COLDS are effecting us in different ways!” Then they went on to showing a guy coughing his throat to bits, a woman snivelling her nose off…and then a girl in the supermarket, being so exhausted she’s falling into her own trolley! And when I saw that, I shouted "That’s ME! That’s really ME!"


I’ve been so exhausted since last week it’s been ridiculous! I’ve hardly had enough energy to get out of bed! EVERYTHING has felt like an incredible effort! Every morning I’ve woken up with a headache (and I normally never get headaches!). And I’ve continuously been freezing to a point where I’ve used 2 duvets and then, still shaking, even turned the oven on, putting it wide open in order to spread some heat! I’ve even started closing the window!

Anyway, there are people who firmly believe that we can think ourselves better, or fool ourselves into believing that we’re fine. So, according to these people’s beliefs, instead of staying at home eating garlic, drinking camomile tea with honey, you should go out there behaving as if you’ve never felt better! Probably wearing a skirt.
So I did! I was out and about, and even went clubbing in the weekend. In a skirt.
“Good thinking”, I reasoned. “Bet I’ve fooled myself already!”. It’s surprisingly easy being gullible when it’s in your own interest, so to speak.

Yeah, right. That remedy only, and I mean only, works on hypochondriacs! That’s because these people tend to statistically be healthier than everybody else together! In other cases – just stick to the tea! Just do it!

Either way, I thought I’d get away with it if I’d just stay in bed on Sunday, eating soup. I was going to enjoy it as well. Earlier in the week German Girl gave me a book with a note saying “To my Swedish friend – so that you won’t get too homesick this autumn” (being a Swedish book!) I thought it was really sweet of her! And what a fantastic timing! :)
So, that went rather smoothly. The book was finished by Sunday evening and I was assured I was going to be fine the next day.

On Monday morning I felt RELATIVELY ok. Then I got out and it started raining. I haven’t seen rain like that for a long time! There were rivers forming in the streets, lakes on the pavements. At some point for a split second I seriously thought I saw a fish! In the end I contemplated binning my umbrella because what was the point? I was soaking wet anyway! And the most soaked part of me were my shoes and socks which stayed that way from 8 am until 5 pm!

That was when my immune system decided I was clearly taking the piss!

So now I’m having a cold.


PS. I don’t have a temperature though. Only got 36.2 degrees! Morning as well as night. And I wasn’t eating ice lollies or anything while taking it either. Bit weird, no? I thought us humans were supposed to have 37. Thought it was only reptiles and fish and stuff that had lower than that. Well, and now me apparently.

But I don’t really see it as a problem. The only thing is that, well, don’t you normally get some sort of super powers when these things happen? Isn’t that part of the bargain? Spiderman could suddenly climb extraordinarily well, Batman got really cool clothes…and the aliens in “The Alien” got to spit dangerous green stuff! So, I mean…

But look, I’m not asking for any of the ultra cool things, like the ability to fly, because I understand that all those are obviously taken. But maybe, I could…become an amphibian and be able to breathe under water? Something like that?

Oh bollocks…Kevin Costner has already got that one after “Water world”!

Ok, but maybe I could be the Ice Girl then? I could be the master of ice? Maybe heat could be my weakness. Fire could be my kryptonite! No, hang on, wait a minute, why the hell would I voluntarily want to have a weakness? Grow up! Seriously, maybe I could have polar bears as guard dogs and an army of Eskimos? Penguins…maybe we could involve penguins somehow? Yeah, maybe penguins could be my alternative to Dracula’s bats? Serve a similar purpose..?


…..zzz..


But then again, is Dracula really a superman? Have to check on wikipedia tomorrow…


..zzz…..


…but in that case I’m genuinely beginning to question whether Alien really classifies as one either.


Zzzzzzzzz…….(Falling asleep. It’s 03:19 am)



Well at least we can establish that both low as well as high temperatures can make you delirious…